President Camacho
“We, the undersigned, would like the Obama administration to recognize the need for a new national anthem, one that even a decade after its creation, is still hot and fresh out the kitchen. America has changed since Francis Scott Key penned our current anthem in 1814. Since then, we have realized that after the show, it’s the afterparty, and that after the party, it’s the hotel lobby, and–perhaps most importantly–that ’round about four, you’ve got to clear the lobby, at which point it’s strongly recommended that you take it to the room and freak somebody.”
A petition to make R. Kelly’s “Ignition,” from 2003’s “Chocolate Factory,” the national anthem, a song that contains such lines as “let me see you/bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce.” The petition, at last look, was more than 89,000 signatures shy of being “seriously considered” by the White House. See it here and pray that we don’t one day look back on “Idiocracy” as a documentary.
EARGGH! 